Bubblewrap Fear and Fake Boobs
Here’s the thing, my brain is totally fucked, and that’s me completely sober. When I added this rant section to the blog I thought how bad this section of the blog will be because it’s pretty much no rules, no agenda, just random shit that pops into my head.
*Pop* There goes another Bubblewrap bubble. Incase you live in some shithole and don’t know what bubblewrap is, here you go:
Used to ship stuff and it’s supposed to protect the item, but let’s face it, it’s there because guys and yes, even girls, like to pop the little bubbles. So, someone sent me some crap in the mail today and it had bubblewrap. Of course I squeezed it, got it popping, and was like, ahhh bubblewrap.
However, Bubblewrap has changed my sexual practices with women that have fake boobs. I’ll admit, I’ve squeezed real breasts nice and hard during sex. There’s a few women that probably still have my fingerprints on their cleavage. I got big hands and I enjoy the squeezing as you’ve seen in some of my previous posts.
Today though I realized as I was popping some bubblewrap that I don’t squeeze fake breasts as hard as I squeeze real ones. That’s not to say that I’m not palming them like a basketball, but that all out full contact squeezing just doesn’t happen and it’s all because of popping bubblewrap.
What the hell would happen if I squeezed so hard, the damn thing popped, that’s right, just like bubblewrap. So tonight I’m here to find the answer, the truth, can you pop a breast implant if you squeeze them too hard. Here’s the link that I came up with: http://www.realself.com/question/hard-squeeze-silicone-gel-implants-causing-rupture
Okay some woman has a husband that’s like me only he doesn’t have the bubblewrap fear. Basically all the doctors are like don’t worry too much, they’re really hard to break, but they’re not lifetime devices, blah blah blah, but two things in the article. First the first doctor says this to the woman:
“By Peter A. Aldea, MD – Memphis Plastic Surgeon
First, few people really enjoy having their appendages squeezed repeatedly much less forcefully. This is true for augmented and non-augmented breasts. You can readily relieve your “paranoia” by informing that compulsive “Mr. Whipple” squeezing husband of yours to stop it or parts of his anatomy will have to reciprocally pass repeated squeeze tests as well. You get to pick those parts.
Second, silicone implants are hard to break BUT they are not impossible to rupture. Repeated compressions and releases eventually weaken the shell to the point where it leaks. As a result implants can last anywhere from a year to over 20 years but eventually they will fail, leak and require exchanging.*
Okay, first off, you’re a fucking idiot. You probably drive around in a Mercedes Benz all built on these fake boobs. So if you’re going to make the sex doll for us, don’t tell us not to play with it vigoreously. Have you ever seen male children play with toys? That’s right, so, if you build it, build it like a tonka fucking truck, something that won’t break under our streneous play.
Second off, the rest of the doctors were cool, said it most likely wouldn’t happen, and it’s more general wear and tear that causes these things to leak. So, I probably still won’t be as vigorous with fake boobs but I don’t think they’re bubblewrap easy breakable.
Now, Let’s see some titties to make us all feel better…some are real, some are fake, and all are enjoyable!
Popularity: 1% [?]
